Are you torn? Do you want to win back your ex, or is it time you begin a new chapter in your life? Wouldn't it be great if really were that easy? But giving up someone who has occupied a huge space in your heart and life isn't has simple as making a logical decision. If it were, there would be no Dr. Phil in the world. But, with a little consideration, you make the decision easier for yourself, and if you're thinking of opening a new chapter in your life, I ask you follow these five easy steps:
*Decision Time: Make One and Stand Tall in the Saddle with it
This isn't the time to get lost in romanticism. Don't waste time thinking of all the good times. After all, you're not looking to win back your ex,you're breaking up, right? There are problems, likely big problems that lead you here. Acknowledge them and act accordingly. This is a decision made for you and your general well-being, and you may not feel entirely comfortable about it. That's okay. Plot a general plan of attack about how you want the next few weeks and months to go. Get out a pen and paper and write it all out. This will help you more than can imagine right now.
*Don't bottle up your emotions
You make yourself miserable by not allowing your emotions to feel whatever it is that's there. Don't deny your feelings. Don't attempt to "get over it." This hurts. It's supposed to. The tenderest, most vulnerable part of yourself is being exposed right now. Take care of it and yourself and admit that it's painful.
*Execute a symbolic act
This can be anything. Set fire to the old love letters. Tear up the 8 x 10 of 'ol' what's their name' that sits near your fireplace. Trash the stuffed dog you both bought at the Fair. Just perform some act and say, "This is symbolic of our ending." It'll go a long way to helping finalize your decision. Don't get lost in fits of rage here. This is a good thing, remember? You've made a decision that's in the best interest of a happy future for yourself. Don't lose sight of that fact.
*Renew Old Acquaintances
This is the corniest advice ever, but it works. Your love interests come and go, but your friends are there forever, and they often know what's best for you before you do. Seek them out. Spend time with them. Maybe your old relationship took away from some of the time you could've spent with them. Be up front. Let them know how important they are in your life and what they mean to you. Just because you're ending one avenue in your life doesn't mean the bus stops. It keeps moving, and you are the driver.
*Don't forget about Number One
Drinking Long Island Iced Teas and watching "They Way We Were" a thousand times isn't going to cut it. Neither is stuffing yourself with chocolate and potatoes. Be well. Think well of yourself. Treat your body with respect. Get out and walk regularly or take up jogging or aerobics. You stand a much better chance of engaging a new interest in your life if you're engaged, as simple as it sounds.
So, to summarize: you know in your heart of hearts of it's best to win back your ex, or if it's time to move on. You really do. Trust yourself instincts and make decisions that are your good for yourself and for what lead you a more fulfilling life. You can do this. You really can. - 30299
*Decision Time: Make One and Stand Tall in the Saddle with it
This isn't the time to get lost in romanticism. Don't waste time thinking of all the good times. After all, you're not looking to win back your ex,you're breaking up, right? There are problems, likely big problems that lead you here. Acknowledge them and act accordingly. This is a decision made for you and your general well-being, and you may not feel entirely comfortable about it. That's okay. Plot a general plan of attack about how you want the next few weeks and months to go. Get out a pen and paper and write it all out. This will help you more than can imagine right now.
*Don't bottle up your emotions
You make yourself miserable by not allowing your emotions to feel whatever it is that's there. Don't deny your feelings. Don't attempt to "get over it." This hurts. It's supposed to. The tenderest, most vulnerable part of yourself is being exposed right now. Take care of it and yourself and admit that it's painful.
*Execute a symbolic act
This can be anything. Set fire to the old love letters. Tear up the 8 x 10 of 'ol' what's their name' that sits near your fireplace. Trash the stuffed dog you both bought at the Fair. Just perform some act and say, "This is symbolic of our ending." It'll go a long way to helping finalize your decision. Don't get lost in fits of rage here. This is a good thing, remember? You've made a decision that's in the best interest of a happy future for yourself. Don't lose sight of that fact.
*Renew Old Acquaintances
This is the corniest advice ever, but it works. Your love interests come and go, but your friends are there forever, and they often know what's best for you before you do. Seek them out. Spend time with them. Maybe your old relationship took away from some of the time you could've spent with them. Be up front. Let them know how important they are in your life and what they mean to you. Just because you're ending one avenue in your life doesn't mean the bus stops. It keeps moving, and you are the driver.
*Don't forget about Number One
Drinking Long Island Iced Teas and watching "They Way We Were" a thousand times isn't going to cut it. Neither is stuffing yourself with chocolate and potatoes. Be well. Think well of yourself. Treat your body with respect. Get out and walk regularly or take up jogging or aerobics. You stand a much better chance of engaging a new interest in your life if you're engaged, as simple as it sounds.
So, to summarize: you know in your heart of hearts of it's best to win back your ex, or if it's time to move on. You really do. Trust yourself instincts and make decisions that are your good for yourself and for what lead you a more fulfilling life. You can do this. You really can. - 30299
About the Author:
Want to learn more about Surviving Infidelity, then visit Stan J. Van Sant's site and get his free 35 page ebook "The 7 Telltale Signs of a Truly Reformed Cheater" - just go to Win Back Your Ex
