If you've been wondering how to save a relationship, below are 7 simple steps you can take to accomplish this, but first a little story. Sean and Lizzy both work hard. Sean works long hours at the office, and Lizzy spends her time tending to the children. Sean doesn't feel she has time for him, and Lizzy thinks Sean doesn't have time for her. Can their relationship be saved? Should it be saved?
If a relationship is to be saved, the first thing you have to do is decide if it's worth saving. Most relationships are savable, but it requires hard work sometimes, and if one party isn't dedicated, then there is really nothing that can be done.
The biggest challenge faced with how to save a relationship is that both people have to come to the decision that the relationship is actually worth saving. There are plenty of people driving by you every day that stay in "convenient" relationships or end up in marriages for the kids, and this just isn't enough. You both have to be dedicated and certain it's worth saving.
Next you have to hone in on the problem or problems that the relationship faces. One of the issues faced with how to save a relationship is that people falsely believe that symptoms of problems are the actual problems.
One example is an affair. Many people think this is a problem that causes break ups, but in truth, an affair is actually a symptom of a larger problem. A lack of real intimacy can lead to an extramarital affair. Most people would look at the situation and think the affair was the problem that caused the break up, but in reality, it was the lack of true intimacy that was the real cause, the affair was the symptom. If you don't address the lack of intimacy, you might be able to use guilt to stop another affair, but most likely another problem (like pornography addiction) may arise because you have dealt with the core of the real problem.
When you start to handle the real core of the issue, and not the symptoms, you are able to save the relationship.
After you have identified the true problems, you are able to verbalize your feelings and share your thoughts while allowing your partner to do the same. Listen to their concerns, and hold your partner's hand while listening to them. This will show them that you want to reconnect even when you are emotionally swirling. When your partner mentions something that hurts you, remember that they aren't usually doing it out of spite, but because they want to save the relationship.
If one of your problems is not spending enough time together, plan a weekend get away or even a date night. You and your partner can take turns coming up with different fun ways to spend the evening together, even if it's a Wednesday.
If the problem facing your relationship is that you don't communicate with each other enough, plan out 20 minutes before bed where it is just the two of you. Turn off the TV, computer, and silence your phone. Just take some time and talk, just the two of you. Don't just schedule it, do it.
Lastly, you have to realize that this is often a long process and will be filled with laughter as well as tears. You may take two steps forward and one step back. Just be sure to be slow to place blame and quick to apologize.
Is the relationship your struggling with worth saving? I hope it is, and if you think so, follow the advice given in this article and be committed to it. - 30299
If a relationship is to be saved, the first thing you have to do is decide if it's worth saving. Most relationships are savable, but it requires hard work sometimes, and if one party isn't dedicated, then there is really nothing that can be done.
The biggest challenge faced with how to save a relationship is that both people have to come to the decision that the relationship is actually worth saving. There are plenty of people driving by you every day that stay in "convenient" relationships or end up in marriages for the kids, and this just isn't enough. You both have to be dedicated and certain it's worth saving.
Next you have to hone in on the problem or problems that the relationship faces. One of the issues faced with how to save a relationship is that people falsely believe that symptoms of problems are the actual problems.
One example is an affair. Many people think this is a problem that causes break ups, but in truth, an affair is actually a symptom of a larger problem. A lack of real intimacy can lead to an extramarital affair. Most people would look at the situation and think the affair was the problem that caused the break up, but in reality, it was the lack of true intimacy that was the real cause, the affair was the symptom. If you don't address the lack of intimacy, you might be able to use guilt to stop another affair, but most likely another problem (like pornography addiction) may arise because you have dealt with the core of the real problem.
When you start to handle the real core of the issue, and not the symptoms, you are able to save the relationship.
After you have identified the true problems, you are able to verbalize your feelings and share your thoughts while allowing your partner to do the same. Listen to their concerns, and hold your partner's hand while listening to them. This will show them that you want to reconnect even when you are emotionally swirling. When your partner mentions something that hurts you, remember that they aren't usually doing it out of spite, but because they want to save the relationship.
If one of your problems is not spending enough time together, plan a weekend get away or even a date night. You and your partner can take turns coming up with different fun ways to spend the evening together, even if it's a Wednesday.
If the problem facing your relationship is that you don't communicate with each other enough, plan out 20 minutes before bed where it is just the two of you. Turn off the TV, computer, and silence your phone. Just take some time and talk, just the two of you. Don't just schedule it, do it.
Lastly, you have to realize that this is often a long process and will be filled with laughter as well as tears. You may take two steps forward and one step back. Just be sure to be slow to place blame and quick to apologize.
Is the relationship your struggling with worth saving? I hope it is, and if you think so, follow the advice given in this article and be committed to it. - 30299
About the Author:
Learn more about how you can How To Save Your Relationship. Stop by Paul 'PJ' Jackson's site where you can find out if it's possible to Save Your Relationship or if it is completely over.
